Dr. Phil

Story Behind The Song

Exactly what the first words say - inspired by Dr. Phil's appearance on a local newscast and by my serial viewing habit.

Song Description

Done in the style of Tom Lehrer, Spike Jones, and (lyrically) Weird Al Yankovic. Pokes fun at Dr. Phil and his guests with an 'if you can't beat 'em join 'em' perspective.

Song Length 0:57 Genre Unique - Parody, Rock - Easy Listening
Lead Vocal Male Vocal Subject Comedy, Funny, Dysfunctional Family
Similar Artists Weird Al Yankovic, Weird Al Yankovic Language English
Era 2000 and later

Lyrics

Dr. Phil 2006 Roger Idaho

Just turned on the news at 5
For a peek at the latest headlines
Guess I shouldn't be too surprised
Dr. Phil's on with my local newsguy

Now I hadn't given very much thought
About what it is that's made him so hot
Well duh, I guess it's obvious
Dr. Phil's not charging diddly squat

Dr. Phil, Dr. Phil
Please give me your advice
Dr. Phil, Dr. Phil
Please fix my miserable life

I've watched your show intently
For weeks now it seems
Picking up tips aplenty
For dealing with mental disease
and I must say I'm truly amazed
It seems you're very at ease
With even the most abhorrently gross
And detestable mental malaise

Let's just take one example
A lady who has trouble I can't bear to watch
And listen here's what's remarkable
It's Dr. Phil's response

He says to her now lady
Your daughter you made a 'ho
So we're gonna make some changes
Or it's offa my show you'll go

Your husband's hooked on pornography
Your son is doing crack
A life changing moment's in order
Or I won't bring you back

Well if you don't think he's effective
I got news for you
That lady's back in just two weeks
Her life's as good as new!

Dr. Phil, Dr. Phil
I know just what you'll say
Give me one hundred per cent pure honesty
or I'll send you on your way


Hey Dr. Phil I know your drill
I've seen it on TV
The foibles of your families
We watch so voyeuristically
Congrats are way in order
You've succeeded fantastically
At creating your own designer form
of dysfunctionality

Speaking of transgender confusion
Take the story of transsexual Bill
couldn't figure out his sexual identity
but not so dr phil
he said to that dear family
don't feel grampaless
I'm sure that your new gamma bill
will be so very medicinal

Hey Dr. Phil you're quite a pill
Your medicine's strong but sure
Just get honest on his show
And he'll fix you up a cure


Hey Dr. Phil you're welcome
At my house anytime
'Cause you know that on occasion
My damn stanzas they don't rhyme
That's when I need an intervention
Of the therapeutic kind
A private one on one session
Is what I have in mind

Now call me presumptuous
but I know just what I need
The cure for my depression
Is you and me on network TV


Dr. Phil, Dr. Phil
Please give me your advice
Dr. Phil, Dr. Phil
Please fix my misereable life

Dr. Phil, Dr. Phil
better than any prescription pill
Dr. Phil, Dr. Phil
Never a better time to be mentally ill

Lyrics Roger Idaho Music Roger Idaho
Producer Roger Idaho Publisher StudioBFI
Performance Roger Idaho Label StudioBFI

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