Song Description

Two kids Pot adventures

Lyrics

"We Swear the Goat Drove the Truck"
By Yves Stilmant © 2025

Verse 1A
It started with a pan of Grandma's treats
We thought they were brownies, turned out they had heat
Then we sipped some moonshine from Gramps' stash
Next thing we knew, we were talkin' real fast

Verse 1B
Billy said, "Man, I'm cravin' some chips"
I said, "Let's get beer, then take UFO pics"
We climbed in the truck with a goat named Clyde
He was sittin' up front, and I swear he can drive

Pre-Chorus
Swerved into town like a rodeo clown
Clyde hit the horn and the goat looked proud
We parked real crooked, rolled into the store
Then the sheriff showed up... like folklore

Chorus
We swear the goat drove the truck
We were just ridin' for luck
We might've been high, but we sure as hell ain't dumb
It was Clyde with his hoofs on the steering column
We swear the goat drove the truck
This here ain't moonshine, it's love
So don't call Mama, and don't call the news
It was all Clyde's fault -- we just needed some brews!

Verse 2A
Sheriff said, "Boys, y'all smell like sin"
I said, "Sir, that's the goat -- please check his chin"
Billy's talkin' 'bout time and space
Clyde's tryin' to eat the deputy's shoelace

Verse 2B
We offered to pee in a cup or two
But Clyde just coughed and sneezed on his shoe
Sheriff said, "Y'all are goin' to jail"
Till Gramps rolled up yellin', "That goat's on bail!"

Pre-Chorus
He said, "Clyde's my kin, third cousin twice bred"
Then he slipped on nachos and bonked his head
Sheriff just stared, then started to laugh
He said, "Y'all dumber than a dog takin' a math class"

Chorus
We swear the goat drove the truck
We ain't got brains, but we got guts
We might be baked, but we're innocent boys
We don't blame weed -- we blame livestock toys
We swear the goat drove the truck
It was hooves, not hands, on the clutch
You can't arrest us for just bein' dumb
'Cause Clyde had the wheel... and we just wanted rum

Bridge (spoken & sung)
(SPOKEN:)
"Sir, if it helps, Clyde's licensed in two counties..."
(SUNG:)
The goat got free, and ran down Main
With the truck in drive and a candy cane

Final Chorus
We swear the goat drove the truck
It's not our fault we ran outta luck
We'll pay for the fence and the soda aisle
But Clyde's the outlaw with the crooked smile
So lock us up, throw away the hay...
But Clyde's already halfway to Santa Fe!

CHANT OUTRO (crowd style):
"We ain't drunk! We ain't nuts!
Clyde's the one who drove the truck!"