Song Description

Me and Earl got moonshine, and this happened...

Lyrics

"Redneck GPS (We're Lost Again, Earl!)"
By Yves Stilmant © 2025
Verse 1A
We set out for beer at a quarter to ten
Said, "Let's take that shortcut past the old pig pen"
Earl said, "Trust me, I know the route"
That's when the last cell tower gave out
Verse 1B
Missed a turn by the burnin' couch
Then got chased by a goat through somebody's outhouse
Passed a bar called "The Devil's Lunch"
And Earl swore it was time for brunch
Pre-Chorus
He said, "Left feels right, and right feels left"
I said, "You're drivin' blind and half past deaf!"
He leaned on instinct and a gut full of pie
Now we're stuck watchin' buzzards fly
Chorus
We're lost again, Earl! (Dang, not again!)
Bugtussle Gulch ain't got a city plan
You said "Shortcut," I said "Nope"
Now we're outta gas and outta hope
We asked directions, got a pig instead
Then Earl tried flirtin' with a man in red
Now we're sleepin' in the sheriff's jail
'Cause Earl mistook his horse for a female

Verse 2A
We flagged down a truck with a wooden door
Driver said, "Son, y'all ain't from here no more"
Then he handed us a squirrel named Pete
And wished us luck from the driver's seat
Verse 2B
Pulled into town with the tailgate low
Blaring Conway Twitty on a busted radio
Earl yelled, "We made it!" -- and tripped on a hen
That's when the sheriff came countin' to ten
Pre-Chorus
He said, "Boys, y'all smell like moonshine stew"
Earl said, "Smells like freedom and barbecue"
I said, "Officer, we're just lost, not mean"
He said, "Tell that to the Dairy Queen"
Chorus
We're lost again, Earl! (This ain't no game!)
Tried to leave town but we circled the same
You said, "Turn left," I said, "That's a tree"
Now we're famous on local TV
We hit a pothole, spilled our snacks
Now we're wanted for disturbin' ducks in packs
Bugtussle jail has got no flair
Just a cot, a cat, and one angry mayor

Bridge
[SPOKEN:] Now listen, Earl, next time I drive...
[SUNG:)] We'll take a map, or maybe survive
Or ask a cow -- she knew the way
Unlike you and your bourbon sway

Final Chorus
We're lost again, Earl! (Just admit it, man!)
You got the sense of a broken fan
You said, "Relax," I said, "Hell no!"
Now we're wanted by a rodeo
Our bail was paid by a preacher's duck
Who said, "Y'all dumb, but you've got pluck"
So here's to next time, with beer and faith...
But I'm never lettin' Earl navigate!

Tagline (chant style)
"Left at the barn, right at the moon --
Thanks again, Earl -- we're doomed real soon!"